A Mother's Explanation of Why She Had Horses for Her Daughter

This is worth a read for anyone with a horse crazy child. I was one of these and can honestly say that horses gave me much of what I am today.

A Mother's Explanation of Why She Had Horses for Her Daughter …… Tracy Meisenbach

My daughter turned sixteen years old today; which is a milestone for most people. Besides looking at baby photos and childhood trinkets with her, I took time to reflect on the young woman my daughter had become and the choices she would face in the future.

As I looked at her I could see the athlete she was, and determined woman she would soon be. I started thinking about some of the girls we knew in our town who were already pregnant, pierced in several places, hair every color under the sun, drop- outs, drug addicts and on the fast track to no-where, seeking surface identities because they had no inner self-esteem. The parents of these same girls have asked me why I "waste" the money on horses so my daughter can ride. I'm told she will grow out of it, lose interest, discover boys and all kinds of things that try to pin the current generation's "slacker" label on my child. I don't think it will happen, I think she will love and have horses all her life.

Because my daughter grew up with horses she has compassion. She knows that we must take special care of the very young and the very old. We must make sure those without voices to speak of their pain are still cared for.

Because my daughter grew up with horses she learned responsibility for others than herself. She learned that regardless of the weather you must still care for those you have the stewardship of. There are no "days off" just because you don't feel like being a horse owner that day. She learned that for every hour of fun you have there are days of hard slogging work you must do first.

Because my daughter grew up with horses she learned not to be afraid of getting dirty and that appearances don't matter to most of the breathing things in the world we live in. Horses do not care about designer clothes, jewelry, pretty hairdos or anything else we put on our bodies to try to impress others. What a horse cares about are your abilities to work within his natural world, he doesn't care if you're wearing $80.00 jeans while you do it. -

Because my daughter grew up with horses she learned about sex and how it can both enrich and complicate lives. She learned that it only takes one time to produce a baby, and the only way to ensure babies aren't produced is not to breed. She learned how babies are planned, made, born and, sadly, sometimes die before reaching their potential. She learned how sleepless nights and trying to out-smart a crafty old broodmare could result in getting to see, as non-horse owning people rarely do, the birth of a true miracle.

Because my daughter grew up with horses she understands the value of money. Every dollar can be translated into bales of hay, bags of feed or farrier visits. Purchasing non-necessities during lean times can mean the difference between feed and good care, or neglect and starvation. She has learned to judge the level of her care against the care she sees provided by others and to make sure her standards never lower, and only increase as her knowledge grows.

Because my daughter grew up with horses she has learned to learn on her own. She has had teachers that cannot speak, nor write, nor communicate beyond body language and reactions. She has had to learn to "read" her surroundings for both safe and unsafe objects, to look for hazards where others might only see a pretty meadow. She has learned to judge people as she judges horses. She looks beyond appearances and trappings to see what is within.

Because my daughter grew up with horses she has learned sportsmanship to a high degree. Everyone that competes fairly is a winner. Trophies and ribbons may prove someone a winner, but they do not prove someone is a horseman. She has also learned that some people will do anything to win, regard-less of who it hurts. She knows that those who will cheat in the show ring will also cheat in every other aspect of their life and are not to be trusted.

Because my daughter grew up with horses she has self-esteem and an engaging personality. She can talk to anyone she meets with confidence, because she has to express herself to her horse with more than words. She knows the satisfaction of controlling and teaching a 1000 pound animal that will yield willingly to her gentle touch and ignore the more forceful and inept handling of those stronger than she is. She holds herself with poise and professionalism in the company of those far older than herself.

Because my daughter grew up with horses she has learned to plan ahead. She knows that choices made today can effect what happens five years down the road. She knows that you cannot care for and protect your investments without savings to fall back on. She knows the value of land and buildings. And that caring for your vehicle can mean the difference between easy travel or being stranded on the side of the road with a four horse trailer on a hot day.

When I look at what she has learned and what it will help her become, I can honestly say that I haven't "wasted" a penny on providing her with horses. I only wish that all children had the same opportunities to learn these lessons from horses before setting out on the road to adulthood. 
Tracy Meisenbach

time to let go

For the last year I have known that I would have to let go of my very best horse friend and send him into another existence, one of his spirit in my mind and heart. My dear Morgan Lance had developed a cancer of the jaw that could not be stopped in its progression. At age 24, I did not want him to suffer invasive treatment, so I watched for signs of discomfort or difficulty knowing that the day would come when I would take responsibility and give him a good and peaceful end.

It has been one month since that warm and sunny day we laid him to sleep on a beautiful knoll at Noble Beasts Ranch. I want you to know that I feel a real contentment and happiness that his end was planned and choreographed so that it would be stress free and peaceful. I selected just the right veterinarian to quietly and expertly administer the overdose of anesthesia. Lance was quiet for the mild sedation prior to the overdose, and I got to tell him to trust me one more time and whisper my love for him. My vet knew exactly how to hold his head so that when he lost consciousness, his knees folded like he was going down for a roll. It was very soft and instant. It was a perfect ending for a perfect horse.

Saying goodbye is sad but a necessary part of caring for a much loved and deserving horse. It is part of the deal. Death is nothing to be afraid of because it is part of life. I am just happy I was able to make it a good end for my best horse friend.

Sir Lance-a-Lect
1985-2009

his hazel eye

his bright attitude

his huge nostrils open to life

his deep heart giving all

his thunderous neigh calling all to witness the glory that he is


photo taken by Sharon at CameraHorse.com
for more photos and story of Lance, see album "Lance The Wonder Horse" on homepage:
http://www.camerahorse.com

 

You don't know what you don't know

My husband quotes the phrase "You don't know what you don't know" and if you stop to think about it for a bit, it is true. I especially see examples of it when it comes to what many people think about horses. Everyone has preset ideas of what is "reality" shaped by their own experience. If they have not yet experienced something, how can they say they know about something, especially if it is something they are deeply immersed in, like horses. One can have had horses for many years and love them dearly not knowing much about how they think about us. We know how we think about them and use them to ride, drive and do sport type things with them. We imagine they love us and are our dear friends, but do we really see how they perceive us?

I think back just 15 short years when I got interested in learning how to drive my horse. I lucked out and found an excellent master of horsemanship who could teach me, so I made weekly trips to his stables and took driving lessons and spent the rest of the day observing his training of other horses. I could stay and watch but couldn't interrupt him in his work until his day was done or he pointed out things to me as he saw fit. For a very long time, I was puzzled at what I was observing but was just happy to be around like a quiet mouse watching and soaking up, unconsciously many things that became clear to me later. Sometimes I would get a bit impatient and irritated that I wasn't being taught what I thought I should be learning. "Just show me how to hold the reins, sit, and use the whip so I can get on with it. "

I had no experience of driving (except holding reins on experienced driving horses for a few minutes riding along with friends who drove). I had owned horses for several years and trail rode quite a bit, but I had no clue whatsoever what it was that I did not know about horses. I had loved them all my life, read every horse book I could find, hung around horses and horse people as much as they would allow.....but still, I didn't know what I didn't know.

I liken my enlightenment to a jigsaw puzzle with many pieces. What I knew from decades of loving and being interested in horses was bits and pieces of the puzzle making part of the picture.
It wasn't until I had the guide of a mentor who could help me fill in the parts that eluded me, did I begin to see the picture as a whole. It was the parts about how the horse thinks about us that made the puzzle have sense in the whole.

I see so many people trying to learn about sport from the top down rather from the bottom up. One has to start with a desire to understand how the horse they will be working with feels and thinks about them before any bond can take place to work together and progress.

That will be my next post: "Working from the bottom up vs. from the top down"

Tom Simmons Oct. 2008 clinic at Noble Beasts Ranch

Some of the photos taken by Sharon at:
http://www.camerahorse.com/
from last fall's clinic on Horsemanship given by Tom Simmons of North Carolina. We bring Tom out at least twice a year for ongoing work with longtime clients and new folk wanting to improve their understanding of horses. Auditing is just as valuable as participating with a horse as Tom explains, as he goes, what he and the horse are doing and thinking. What he explains to folks is very important and gives anyone listening and watching, some "light bulb" moments for them to better understand how horses think and act in our world.

Tom works with people as well as their horses so they can continue the learning process at home and get along with their own horses more smoothly. It doesn't matter what breed, discipline, or level one is in currently, Tom can improve your understanding.

My particular interest is carriage driving. I know how important it is for my safety, as well as my horse and others around me that my horse is mannered, looks to me for direction and is obedient to what I ask. I have learned from Tom what I need to do for me to be able have confidence and get what I ask from my horse. These things don't come from just wanting them. One has to be taught these things and I am glad I have such an experienced guide.

how deep does one go?

I wonder just how much one really cares about how a horse thinks about things. How important is it for a smooth relationship to consider how they think? I look around at how most people relate to their horses and I see a very one sided relationship....and it ain't on the horse's side.

People today are very much like people have always been and use horses for work, pleasure...whatever. They use them but don't get to really know or consider what makes a horse want to work for humans in a willing manner. Most folks just want to get right to the use of them without caring about the long, slow work to build a lifelong partner built on trust.

Horses are mainly used, not understood. I was disappointed recently to watch someone in the sport of Combined Driving "use" their horse to satisfy their own personal agenda for speed and glory. Instead of learning by building on speed with their horse, they pulled out all the stops and went as fast as they could shove the horse, costing them by rolling the carriage and thus ending their day's sport. They stood around looking embarrassed while others tended the horse that had been pulled off his feet by the overturned carriage. I think if they thought they could, they would have re-hooked and continued. I felt really bad for the horse as I could see how in future, this horse would probably fail, either mentally or physically.

This is the sad reality for many horses in sport. It is not admirable, to me, to see competitors come back with new horses year after year. Burn 'em up, then spit them out.

weaning the foals

I recently visited my friends Tom and Cathy Simmons at their Lincoln Hills Farm, and was lucky enough to arrive the day Tom weaned this year's foal crop of three Morgan fillies. Tom is a nationally known horse trainer and breeder.

Besides Tom, there was wife Cathy and young daughter Tori, myself and Willy, the stable help. The two mares and three foals were in their large grassy pasture. One of the foals had recently lost her mother and had been taken up by her grandmother along with her baby. The first order of business was to halter the mares, and Cathy led the one mare followed by her foal out of the pasture. The rest of us had a job to just get behind....not too close, and provide movement with the mare to continue forward towards the barn. The baby followed her mother easily, keeping an eye on us following like "point riders" do with cattle. The barn has a wide aisle and going into it from the bright sunlight was a new experience for the foal, but mama was going so she did also.

We all moved around slowly with arms down and with no excitement to position ourselves in case the baby didn't want to go into the box stall that mama was being led into. Tom was directing us all to ensure there would be no one "out of position" or excitement exuded. No biggee, so Cathy walked the mare back out of the stall and the door was slid closed to keep the baby inside. Back to pasture to catch up the remaining mare to repeat the process. This time went almost as well as the first with the exception of the foal who was taken over by her grandmother. She followed the other two but nearing the barn, she decided to go back if she could. Tom directed us to our positions to keep behind her and block the way back to pasture. After an attempt or two and bringing the mare back to show her the way, the filly decided to follow her grandmama. But first, she had to take a few bites of greener grass and pick her way over carriage shafts in the barnyard. No fear here....just a bit of independence. Tom had a soft length of rope ready to give us "point people" more of a barrier to herd the independent little filly into the stall with the others. Tom put his arms around her neck and went with her movement guiding her into the stall opening to join the others. He told us never to apply force or resistance as she does not know what that is yet. Just go with her motion and guide her. That is what he did.

Once the foals were in the stall and the mares taken out and back to the pasture, there was calling back and forth until the feed arrived and settled the babies. The mares would occasionally call, but soon wandered to the far end of the pasture and relaxed with their heads down eating. You could almost hear the relief from their motherly duties. These babies were 4 and almost 5 months old and had not had any handling except at feed time when Tom would enter the pasture to give the mares their mixed feed.

Tom moves among horses with slow, non threatening gesture. It is purposeful, normal and the same throughout any stage of horse handling. He exhibits no emotion to stir similar emotion in horses. No sneaking, no anger, no fear. If one could master that alone, they could have greater success with horses.

The next thing on Tom's list was to put halters on these foals. He took his soft rope into the stall and using his body positioning, moved them so they would file past him, touching them as they went. He would walk into their "nose into the corner" arrangement and they would stand or peel off while he gently rubbed their necks, backs and sides. He used his rope to show them that there was nothing to fear and it was just another thing to be rubbed with and guided with. Tom would work the rope around their neck and pull gently with the two open ends, never tightening the rope, just pulling gently and guiding at the same time. Soon, each was content that the rope was nothing to be concerned about and Tom was teaching them the first rudimentary steps in being led and contained.

The work with the rope made it easy to just go ahead and put the halter on the baby. They already got the idea they were being contained so they did not fight the halter being buckled on their head. Tom always went with the movement of the baby and never gave the baby the feeling of being trapped or having to resist. One by one, they received their halters.

In the photo, a two year old colt is watching the process from his adjoining stall on the backside.

Since all went well with no fuss or muss, Tom decided to worm the babies. One by one, they stood like they had done this many times while he deftly, smoothly, and with slow deliberance, gave each their dose of paste wormer. In these photos, I'd like you to notice the body language of Tom. If one could keep a soft body, horses are not alarmed. Sometimes we are quick and jerky and this can cause a quick reaction from the horse.

Worming done....weaning done....in less than 2 hours. The mares finished with their mothering and nothing left but to dry up their milk production and join the rest of the herd. The babies are together for security and companionship ready to begin the process in learning to live with humans. These babies will have the best start in that process by learning from what Tom has gained in a lifetime of working with horses. It is so easy for these babies.

Tom, ever the patient teacher, asked if we would like to go inside the stall and be with the babies. YES! What an invitation. I was first on deck and walked into the stall listening to Tom's direction and comments on how to improve. My first mistake was to reach out with my hand. "No....just walk up close and place your hand on them without sneaking." Ok. I found myself in like a mini round pen and used my body positioning to move them as I chose. I was given the rope but did not use it. I just held it and occasionally, rubbed with it as if it were part of my hand. I took hold of the halter every now and then and just turned the head towards me then let go. I didn't want to leave as they were so curious and wonderful to touch with my whole hand. Each of us had a turn in with the babies.

The next day, between watching Tom work his client's horses, Tom decided to take a foal out for it's first leading lesson in the round pen. I didn't get to photograph this but I'll describe the first lesson. The first baby to present itself was the baby to work with. Tom snapped a long lead on the halter and when the stall door was slid open, I walked in behind the baby and out it walked with Tom in the front with just enough presence on it's head to start it in the right direction. The walk to the round pen was no more than 20 yards. All I did was just get behind and provide forward movement towards the round pen. All Tom did was guide the baby into the pen. Once the gate was closed, Tom continued to guide and release allowing the baby to move as it would feel necessary. This session lasted no more than 15 minutes or so and then we repeated the process of returning the baby to the others who were calling to it and she to them. That was it for the day but it showed me the steps that go into something as simple as leading a horse and how the foundation is laid down. Tom's plan was to leave them in this stall for a few days before taking them into their own pasture to romp and play together.

Here are the truths I learned from this weaning process:

1. It does not have to be a "rodeo" with horses.
2. Your body language determines how you will be perceived by the horse.
3. Your inside emotions determine how you will be received by your horse.
4. Calm and quiet is best.
5. I am a lucky person to have such a great mentor to learn from.